• Re: Death and dying (wasL

    From Nancy Backus@1:123/140 to Joe Mackey on Thu Aug 29 17:07:00 2019
    Quoting Joe Mackey to Nancy Backus on 08-27-19 04:43 <=-

    Too often today people don't want to think about death. But no
    one has gotten out alive yet. >
    Except Enoch and Elijah... ;)

    Yeah, forgot about those two. :)
    I think there's a third as well.

    Perhaps the One that rose from the dead and ascended into heaven to
    return again some day....? :)

    Add hospice to that list... hospice at home is now an acceptable
    alternative

    As it should be.
    My father died at home, late at night, with some of the family
    around him. He didn't want me to be awakened, but my mother did
    shortly after. With my mother it was a phone call from my brother
    early one morning, who had been called by the hospital.

    I'm all for using hospice when there's enough notice... Daddy died in
    the hospital but it wasn't expected... his vitals had been perfect when
    he'd been checked at midnight... at 2, for the next check, he was
    gone... they tried unsuccessfully to revive him, which ended up adding a measure of ghastly humor* to the situation, and prompted my mom to decide
    to be DNR and not have similar done to hime...

    *there was a trach tube sticking up out of his mouth while we were there
    in the room with the body afterwards... having our own family wake of
    sorts...

    involved in parish in any way since) died in Florida (or somewhere)
    and a relative demanded the temporary rector (pastor)
    call her? talk to her?

    Don't tell me part of that was cut off again...

    'Fraid so....

    I'll briefly recap this.
    The parish secretary got a call from a woman, didn't know her, a
    relative of her's, who hadn't been in the parish since 1955, died and
    she wanted a graveside burial office. (She has nothing to do with the parish and lived out of town as well.)

    The body was brought back for burial...? I do trust that the lady
    didn't expect the rector to fly down to FL for the office....?

    And she she wanted it the next morning. She couldn't understand why everything wasn't dropped for her, and she refused to change the time since she was flying out of town an hour or so afterward. When someone would be available.
    When told no one was available at that time she got huffy and hung
    up saying there would be no burial office in that case.
    She acted like she was ordering a pizza delivered.

    Maybe in her mind the two were equivalent...? You'd think that the
    phone call could have been made right after the death... there had to be
    some elapsed time there....

    We did have the burial service for each of my parents within a few days
    of the death, since neither wanted to be embalmed or to have any of the
    funeral home visitings, etc... But we let our pastor know right away,
    and in fact, he was there at Daddy's hospital wake, and came after
    services on Sunday for Mommy's home wake (she died early on a Sunday morning).... He was in on the planning from the beginning....

    ttyl neb

    ... I'm just a peripheral visionary.

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